As music directors/worship leaders, what is our reaction when asked to lead music for a funeral?

When it’s someone we know well, quite often, we will gladly jump in a seek to help out.

But other times? Obligation? Frustration?

If we serve in a large, or quickly growing church, quite often our time is already filled with many aspects of ministry, and an unexpected addition to our calendar can feel overwhelming.

But what about when it’s someone we didn’t really get along with? Or someone we barely know in our congregation? (This raises another question about how helpful it is to grow a church to that size, but that’s another discussion).

Or the relative of a congregation member who doesn’t go to church?

Over the years I’ve had the many opportunities to serve many families during these heart-rending moments, often serving alongside my good friend… also called Doug.

• I’ve stood with a friend in a receiving line while people fumble their way through condolences… some saying incredibly stupid things (“I recently lost my cat, so I know how you feel”)

• I’ve been in the back of a sanctuary prior to a service as a mother and child saw their husband and father in the casket for the very first time, watching and hearing them break down in sobs.

• I’ve served for good friends whose health declined over a decade until they were called home.

• I’ve served for good friends who lost their daughter tragically, unexpectedly, and far, far too soon.

I pray we see funerals as an opportunity to serve, rather than simply a weighty obligation.

For it is here at the funeral where all we’ve been declaring in song and spoken encouragement is finally put – not to rest – but into practice. This is the moment we have hopefully been preparing our brother and sisters for.

The end of life for the Christian is the final “trust fall.” As we sing of the comforts afforded, the homeland longed for, and the ultimate renewal of all things, they are only comforts if what comes after death according to the Bible is truly reality. (1 Cor. 15:19)

Here at the funeral – a well-handled funeral – the Gospel is again made clear to all who attend.  That there is pardon for the sinner and welcome into the family of God.  That enemies can be turned into adopted children – loved and welcomed into a glorious forever-future we cannot begin to comprehend.

I once led music at a service for someone whose faith I did not know – nor did I assume, one way or the other.  During the service I sang “Amazing Grace (My Chains Are Gone).”

A year later a woman approached me after a church service.  She introduced herself and shared that she was in attendance of that service, and having heard that version of the hymn for the first time, subsequently began attending church.  She had since come to faith in Jesus.

It is an opportunity to serve our grieving family, affirm the reality of our faith, and share the hope that we as believers have.

Worship leaders, church musicians –  let us not dismiss this beautiful and pivotal life moment because we find funerals depressing.  But let us serve with love and compassion, and with full assurance of faith.